Of aches and changes

I've been drifting in and out of sleep. I can't even think well. Why is it that everytime April comes, everything has to be so hard? I'm not sure if it's April having some vengeance on me or whatnot.

Sometimes, it amazes me how feelings can change so fast. How promises don't mean a thing and memories are just, memories.

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I've tried my best

I've given my best

Little did I know

That even that was not enough

A little doubt

A little thought

It was all it takes

To cause so much pain

Love is hard

Love is painful

But I know it's just as rewarding

But I know it's just as worth it

The things we had

The things we did

I had hoped that it would be strong enough

I had hoped that it would hold us together

All I hope for

Is that things work out

Is that memories meant something

Is that you would find that feeling again

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I am so messed up. Why? This is the thing about feelings. It's shocking. It changes so fast. 

So fast, so much.... That it's so scary. I hate myself for doing this to myself.